The RPG Guy – A Plant that throws babies?
Believe it or not… I wasn’t always The RPG Guy.
Put the stones down people!
Indeed I was one of those dudes that never even heard of the word role playing, let alone dice. I trudged down the halls of life doing what everyone else did. Until one day.
It’s quite a long story about how I morphed into The RPG Guy, so grab yourself a cup of coffee and freaking sit back down! Noob! :)
You: Why the heck did he get so angry? What the F?
The RPG Guy: If you paid attention, I had a “:)” at the end of that sentence which obviously means I was joking! So, shut up and sit down!
You: Ok… /cry :(
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The RPG Seed is Planted
Back in my elementary years my older brothers (much older) were into D&D. There were a few times where I would see them painting miniatures for their next game and of course like the curious creatures we are I asked what they were doing.
One of my brothers chimed in, his eyes glistening at his still wet creation. (No, it wasn’t poop! And BTW, you’re gross!)
Older Brother: This is my warrior character I’m using for our next D&D game!
The RPG Kid (or for you D&D guys… The RPG Guy Level 1): Whoa, that looks sweet! But why is there blood on his swords?
Older Brother: That’s because he’s a level 52,000 warrior and he has 23,000,000,000 EXP!
The RPG Guy Level 1: Oh My Gosh Bar Be Que Be Right Back Rolling on the Floor Laughing-copter!!! (I’m sorry, but we didn’t have acronyms then that explained thoughts like OMGBRBROFLcopter.) That sounds so awesome! But what does that mean?
And… scene.
Some Nurturing of the RPG Seed
My brothers finally let me play! Which really just turned into me watching, mouth gaped open drooling at my brothers describing things in vivid detail and me trying to figure out what was going on. The most I contributed was when I threw the dice. I don’t even think I did that very often. It was sad. I mean really freaking sad! (For the love of God stop crying!)
You: But, I’m not crying!
The RPG Guy: You are. Shut up. Quit your sobbing and let me continue… GOSH!
So, naturally from there I didn’t do much with this new weird game that I was oddly “in-like” with. Heck, I still didn’t know what the game was.
That Little Seed Sees Light!
A few years later I find myself at some house (Mom and Dad were having lunch with someone…).
You: You have a Mom and Dad!?
The RPG Guy: Hey! Don’t be a crap-monkey! I am a human being! You know what? Señor Coffee just called me and wants to know when you’re coming back. Go, get some more coffee, you butt!
Now that you’re back and all caffeinated and sane again, let’s continue. So, the person’s house we were at had a kid about my age. After exhausting all of the little guy’s games he asks me and my BFF (Yes, I brought a friend.) if we want to play D&D. Unbeknownst to me, my BFF knew a little bit about what D&D was, because he had a video game at home about it. So, we played.
No books. No music. Not even any dice. Nothing flashy. We just wrote down our classes, and a few other made up numbers and you know what?
You: Whaaaaat?
The RPG Guy: Yeah, it was freaking awesome. Even after all those years I still remember it.
You: Dude! You must be old!
The RPG Guy: Oh, ok. Well, what I didn’t tell you was that when Señor Coffee was on the phone he told me he was going to set you up an appointment with Mr. Bowels and Sir Toilet! So… good luck with that.
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That Little RPG Plant Gets Crushed :(
Remember that I told you that my BFF had a D&D video game at home? Well, after hanging out at his house one day goofing around killing monsters on it I decide to tell my folks about this cool new game I was playing. I just wish someone warned about what was going to happen.
The RPG Kid (Level 4): I played the coolest game today Mom and Dad! It’s called D&D… Dungeons and Dragons… something like that.
Parents: WHAT!?? DON’T YOU EVER PLAY THAT GAME AGAIN!
What in poop’s name did I do to be denied this really fun game? What I didn’t know was about all of the controversy that had hit after an unstable D&D playing teen committed suicide. It was very tragic and my parents did what they should have done.
The Plant Gets its Leaves Back
A few years later of going through life without the wonderful world of RPG’s something happens. Those few experiences that I had gently began to brush their way back onto the canvas of my life. So, I did what any good kid did. I rebelled.
So, armed with one D6, some paper and a pencil I began drawing up my own game. Literally. I first began some very crude drawings of a few towns and a map. I even worked on it while I was at school and was even asked by a few classmates what I was doing and if they could play.
So, my first RPG was created called Sega. I did this so my friends and I could say, “Let’s go play some Sega” in front of my folks. Whether it was right or wrong, it worked and I was able to embark on my journey of maturing into the RPG Master that I am. :P
You: Say something funny! Hey, I’m all out of coffeeeee!
The RPG Guy: Shut up!
Grow Plant Grow!
Several years later of playing around with creating my own RPG system / campaign I come along some of the best role players to date. Since I was big into acting (I was in every school play.)
You: OMG you’re ghay!
The RPG Guy: I can bench press 315 pounds… which yes, means I can toss a baby pretty darn far. Now, shut up foo’!
You: You toss babies!?
Acting is a huge passion of mine and after landing a major role in my first school play all of the theatre geeks naturally tried to get me to join their group. I was propositioned to play probably close to once a week to be a part of their gaming group. Had I known what I was missing I never would have turned them down.
You see, I still had some guilt for playing my D&D esque game that I had created that my parents didn’t know about. So, I did what I never thought would work.
I was honest. One day after coming home from Church.. What? You’re not shooting any flames at me? Ok… I’ll continue. I decide to lay it on my folks.
It was a sunny day with a slight breeze outside. Not too hot that we kept the windows rolled down. My parents yelled over the sound of the whipping wind.
Parents: What are you going to do when we get home?
The RPG Kid (Level 10): I’m probably going to geek out. You know I play role playing games, right?
Parents: Yeah, we do. Just be safe, ok?
That was easy! It really was such a cool moment.
You: Awwww!
The RPG Guy: I toss babies! Now, hush! /ignore
So, the next time I was asked to play guess what? That’s right, I played. And what did we play? My favorite gaming system out there right now – GURPS.
That first game I played a paladin-type character that was so entirely over-the-top that I surprised myself. However, it wasn’t all about the experience points (character points in GURPS) and all that jazz. It was about truly creating something that was genuine and really hit your core. It was a real story with real characters. It was art.
The Plant Blooms into Beautiful RPG Guy
After seeing a different perspective of how a role playing game could be played my competitive nature took over and I went back to my roots. I began to write.
Although I was already quite experienced with facilitating, creating functional mechanics and using visual aids I never looked at playing an RPG as an art form – as a craft, just like acting.
The new group that I played in didn’t quite plan things out and oftentimes seemed a bit unprepared, where as previous groups were well put together, but didn’t quite have the artful approach. My approach wasn’t just about blending and balancing playing styles, but also using the appropriate play style for the group.
Since I knew I was going to be playing with the super actor group again I knew that’s what I had to provide for them. And, that I did.
The game was a hit which really just means it was one of those games that you play for like 24 hours straight.
But Who is The RPG Guy Really?
I’m a Ninja-Dragon with midget blood! (Eat that Charlie Sheen! Wait – don’t. For the love of all that’s holy please don’t literally eat a midget!)
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